Thursday, November 30, 2006

Pussy Pucker Pots


This vegan lip balm ROCKS. I have a pot in 'Muffberry' and it tastes great ;-)

The brainchild of Technodyke.com founder Stacy Bias, Pussy Pucker Pots were created to give women a sexpositive/feminist lip balm that vegans could indulge in too. It's made by dykes for dykes (see them making it here: http://www.pussypuckerpots.com/process.asp), and the names of the flavours alone are enough to make you want to pull out your wallet:

Muffberry, Areola Apricot, Chocolate Nipple Ripple, Clitoris Citrus, Labia Lemon, Nice Melons, Plain Ol' Prude, Shaved Peach, Strawberry Snatch, TaTa Tangerine, Vanilla Vulva and my favourite, Don't Need No MANgo.
You can get it in Auckland from Cherrybomb Comics at 41 New North Rd Eden Terrace http://homepages.ihug.co.nz/~cherrybomb/ (they only have some flavours- it might pay to call first to make sure they have the one you want (09) 374-4504) or order it online for about NZD$17.60 including delivery (1 pot) from http://www.rainbowstore.com.au/category247_1.htm
Nice xrissy present!

Monday, November 27, 2006

Review: Imagine Me and You



Imagine Me and You
(warning: contains spoilers)

Rendering lesbians on film is always problematic. When a minority group scrambles for any positive media attention you're never going to satisfy everyone nor get an across-the-board representation of every face in that sub-culture. Take the criticism levelled at 'The L Word'. There was much debate when the series first emerged in regards to it presenting only a certain type of lesbian- an affluent white city femme living in a lesbian utopia. The writers defended themselves against this accusation by stating it was neither their intention nor responsibility to represent the entire lesbian community of the United States of America. It's also unlikely that a series about butch dykes going to pot-lucks in the country would rate very highly outside my living room.

Such is the way of Imagine Me and You- the protagonists are two classically beautiful femme well educated white women, the ever-Sapphic Piper Perabo and relative newcomer Lena Headey. Piper plays the same cute spunky but soft archetype in Rachel that we've come to expect from her in roles such as Violet in Coyote Ugly and Nora in Cheaper By the Dozen. Lena's character Luce is the 'butcher' of the two (though that's a lark), the strong confident florist who knows who she is (a lesbian) and what she wants (Piper). Apart from having an almost latent moral dilemma about Piper being a newlywed she sets herself on a straight course- destination Piper's pants.

Piper's Rachel makes a very fast change from someone who looks to have never questioned her hetero sexual orientation before to someone who is prepared to sacrifice her new marriage for a kind of relationship we'll assume she's never thought about before (or it's wider reaching implications). The writers attempt half-heartedly to set us up to accept this unlikelihood by including a revealing dinner conversation over which the characters wax lyrical on the nature of true love (in short, Rachel thinks you 'make do' while Luce believes in love at first sight- naturally).

All in all, Imagine Me and You is a cute film that gives you warm fuzzies if you manage to suspend your disbelief (which film-watching dykes are used to doing). I'd love to go see a mainstream lesbian movie with a diverse cast of fully fleshed out lesbian and bisexual characters, of all sizes and of varied economic status- but I think I've got more chance of raising Sappho from the dead and convincing her to be my girlfriend.

It's just as well I don't speak Greek.

Thursday, November 23, 2006

5 great lesbian novels

...according to me.

1. Affinity- Sarah Waters

This book haunted me, I couldn't put it down. It wasn't as well received as 'Tipping the Velvet' amongst those whom I know have read them both, but 'Affinity' just gripped and saddened me, and that sense of sorrow and loss that I felt at times while reading it captured my heart more than the quirky more upbeat (if only just at times!) 'Tipping the Velvet'.


2. Written on the Body- Jeanette Winterson

The language of this prose novel is sublime, Winterson is a true wordsmith who really knows her craft. This tale of desire and longing is truly spellbinding.


3. Beneath the Blonde- Stella Duffy

The third Saz Martin thriller hooks you right at the start and keeps you reading- this is a one-sitting book, or at least you'll want it to be. Like some of her other titles, it's also partially set in New Zealand.


4. She Came to the Castro- Mary Wings

I like my lesbian detective thrillers (don't we all). The fourth Emma Victor novel is a fun ride, Wings' wit is acerbic, and I can never quite figure it all out 'til the end, which is a big plus in the sometimes jaded genre of the crime novel.


5. Fanny- Erica Jong

Not strictly a lesbian novel in the separatist sense, Erica Jong still tickles and thrills with this lusty, bawdy sapphic update of 'Fanny Hill: Memoirs of a Woman of Pleasure.'

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Putting my money where my mouth is

I just received my latest purchase from merchandykes- a rainbow ribbon lapel pin and a rainbow pride 'dog tag'... and I must say the tag is awesome... I love love love it!

Thanks for sourcing the stuff MDs!

www.merchandykes.co.nz

Saturday, November 18, 2006

Favourite Lesbian Poem

This is my favourite lesbian poem, by Gerry Gomez Pearlberg...

Sailor

The girls go by in their sailor suits
They catch my eye in their sailor suits
Big or slight they all grin like brutes
In steam-ironed pants and buffed jet boots
They saunter right up my alley.

I study their easy, confident strides
Crew cuts and white hats capping decadent eyes
They shiver the pearl on night's oystery prize
They shiver me timbers, unbuckle me thighs
This alley was made for seething.

From the sweat of a street lamp or lap of the sea
A smooth sailor girl comes swimming to me
Says she wants it right now and she wants it for free
Clamps her palms to my shoulders, locks her knees to
my knees
This alley was made for cruising.

Her face is dark coffee, her head has no hair
Her cap shines like neon in the bristling night air
She pins her brass metals to my black brassiere
Tucks her teeth like bright trophies behind my left ear
This alley is very rewarding.

She tosses her jacket and rolls up her sleeves
On her arm's a tattoo of an anchor at sea
She points to the anchor and whispers 'That's me.'
And the wetter I get the more clearly I see
This alley was made for submersion.

Her fingers unbutton my 501s
This girl's fishing for trouble and for troubling fun
She slides off her gold rings and they glint like the sun
Then she smirks, rubs her knuckles, and spits out her gum
This alley was made for swooning.

Now she's pushing her prow on my ocean's sponge wall
Uncorking my barnacle, breaking my fall
And there's pink champagne fizzling down my decks and
my hall
As she wrecks her great ship on my bright port-of-call
This alley was made for drowning.

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Michael Moore's Pledge to Republicans

Although this is not New Zealand related as such, I'm putting this up because I like it.

"A Liberal's Pledge to Disheartened Conservatives

November 14th, 2006

To My Conservative Brothers and Sisters,

I know you are dismayed and disheartened at the results of last week's election. You're worried that the country is heading toward a very bad place you don't want it to go. Your 12-year Republican Revolution has ended with so much yet to do, so many promises left unfulfilled. You are in a funk, and I understand.

Well, cheer up, my friends! Do not despair. I have good news for you. I, and the millions of others who are now in charge with our Democratic Congress, have a pledge we would like to make to you, a list of promises that we offer you because we value you as our fellow Americans. You deserve to know what we plan to do with our newfound power -- and, to be specific, what we will do to you and for you.

Thus, here is our Liberal's Pledge to Disheartened Conservatives:

Dear Conservatives and Republicans,

I, and my fellow signatories, hereby make these promises to you:

1. We will always respect you for your conservative beliefs. We will never, ever, call you "unpatriotic" simply because you disagree with us. In fact, we encourage you to dissent and disagree with us.

2. We will let you marry whomever you want, even when some of us consider your behavior to be "different" or "immoral." Who you marry is none of our business. Love and be in love -- it's a wonderful gift.

3. We will not spend your grandchildren's money on our personal whims or to enrich our friends. It's your checkbook, too, and we will balance it for you.

4. When we soon bring our sons and daughters home from Iraq, we will bring your sons and daughters home, too. They deserve to live. We promise never to send your kids off to war based on either a mistake or a lie.

5. When we make America the last Western democracy to have universal health coverage, and all Americans are able to get help when they fall ill, we promise that you, too, will be able to see a doctor, regardless of your ability to pay. And when stem cell research delivers treatments and cures for diseases that affect you and your loved ones, we'll make sure those advances are available to you and your family, too.

6. Even though you have opposed environmental regulation, when we clean up our air and water, we, the Democratic majority, will let you, too, breathe the cleaner air and drink the purer water.

7. Should a mass murderer ever kill 3,000 people on our soil, we will devote every single resource to tracking him down and bringing him to justice. Immediately. We will protect you.

8. We will never stick our nose in your bedroom or your womb. What you do there as consenting adults is your business. We will continue to count your age from the moment you were born, not the moment you were conceived.

9. We will not take away your hunting guns. If you need an automatic weapon or a handgun to kill a bird or a deer, then you really aren't much of a hunter and you should, perhaps, pick up another sport. We will make our streets and schools as free as we can from these weapons and we will protect your children just as we would protect ours.

10. When we raise the minimum wage, we will pay you -- and your employees -- that new wage, too. When women are finally paid what men make, we will pay conservative women that wage, too.

11. We will respect your religious beliefs, even when you don't put those beliefs into practice. In fact, we will actively seek to promote your most radical religious beliefs ("Blessed are the poor," "Blessed are the peacemakers," "Love your enemies," "It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God," and "Whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me."). We will let people in other countries know that God doesn't just bless America, he blesses everyone. We will discourage religious intolerance and fanaticism -- starting with the fanaticism here at home, thus setting a good example for the rest of the world.

12. We will not tolerate politicians who are corrupt and who are bought and paid for by the rich. We will go after any elected leader who puts him or herself ahead of the people. And we promise you we will go after the corrupt politicians on our side FIRST. If we fail to do this, we need you to call us on it. Simply because we are in power does not give us the right to turn our heads the other way when our party goes astray. Please perform this important duty as the loyal opposition.

I promise all of the above to you because this is your country, too. You are every bit as American as we are. We are all in this together. We sink or swim as one. Thank you for your years of service to this country and for giving us the opportunity to see if we can make things a bit better for our 300 million fellow Americans -- and for the rest of the world.

Signed,

Michael Moore
mmflint@aol.com
www.michaelmoore.com

P.S. Please feel free to pass this on."

Monday, November 13, 2006

Merchandykes

Merchandykes have their new catalogue out! They have great pride jewellery, cards, T-shirts and a few DVDs... it's nice to see a local queer retailer make their 1st birthday!

Some of my favs:

Stainless Steel Pride Ring $18


Liquid Silver Pride Necklace $15


Shell Pride Necklace $5


Bear Claw Stud (for the boys) $12


Double Male Pewter Disc (Double Female available too)$25


Chrome Key Ring $7


Rainbow Ribbon Lapel Pin $5


PRIDE Lapel Pin $5


'Sexy Dyke' T-Shirt $25 (or two for $40)


Gay Barcode T-shirt $25 (or two for $40)


Lesbian Greeting Card $4.50


'Desert Hearts' DVD $32


Please note there are many more items on their website http://www.merchandykes.co.nz (or you can click the quick link on the right)